It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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