Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Randomize
