hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
