Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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