he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
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I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
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And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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