he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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