we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
