So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
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