the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
