one might say we're banned from that church
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Randomize
