let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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