i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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