I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
