I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
false alarm, still single
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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