I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
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