You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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