Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize