I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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