If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Randomize
