Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
