I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
