Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
