I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
