she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Two words: nipple clamps
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