I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
