I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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