we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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