so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Success! We fucked roommates!
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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