you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition