YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
