My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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