I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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