No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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