Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
