it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize