Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
