Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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