If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
The Olympian is in my bed
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