i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Two words: blizzard sex
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
