you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
