Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
