oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Randomize
