Porn is love you can see.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize
