It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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