the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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