Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
