Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
