My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
