Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I touched a dick in church today
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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