we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
