As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i just sent this text using only my big toe
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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